Milk- It Does A Body Good!

Getting ready for Chase's ... ummm... 1 month? 6 week? 2 week? ... I don't know- Doctor's appointment this morning, I went to put him in one of his onesie/sleepers, and there was no way it was going to fit. I hadn't noticed it as much when I use the 2-piece outfits, but this time... haha.

So the verdict is in, over the course of 2 weeks since we came home (seriously?? Only 2 weeks???) He has gained a full pound, 2 inches, and 1 cm head circumference- not too shabby!!! Of course that means he's about the size Dave & I were when we were born- 19 1/2" length, 6 lbs even (we were both 6lb 10oz), and not sure our head circumference, but Chase is up to 34cm... So our job is to keep eating! Before we know it, he'll catch up in no time at all. They say they should gain around 1 oz a day- he's 39 days- which 2 lbs is 32 oz- account for his weight loss initially- and you have him holding onto that average. Figuring he's 39 weeks gestation- would have potentially been born sometime around now, and possibly been around this size- soooooo- not too bad :)

Of course, to others he's still just a "peanut"- but hey- to us he's huge! As we were out at the doctors today, I was asked how old he is, so I reply "Almost 6 weeks"- to which I was asked, "You mean 6 days??" Uh- no... oh well- lol- guess I should get used to it for a while... looking forward to a nap before we get Kaely, the rainy day is helping lull us both to sleep :)

Wanted: Invention or Just a Little Bit of Magic

Throughout months of bedrest I thought about all sorts of inventions that needed to be brought to life out of sheer necessity to survive being couch/bed-bound... now with the little man it's the same crazy ideas all over again. Technically I'm still stuck with the 10 pound weight limit and other physical restrictions, add on the whole- "I've got a sleeping/nursing baby on me and I just got comfortable" -and trying to do something as simple as grabbing the remote control that has just fallen to the floor becomes a physical challenge. LOL.

Think along the lines of "The Clapper"- which- I am seriously debating on purchasing, but how many appliances can I really attach it to? I've already taken advantage of the timer setting on the coffee maker- that's my inspiration to get out of bed in the morning- after I've hit snooze a few times. I envision "Bewitched" - wiggle my nose and my water is refilled! Or my cereal that is still sitting on the counter magically gets milk poured into it and floats over to my side table so I can actually eat breakfast. Or the dogs- oh geez- the dogs are able to walk themselves and have a portioned food dispenser (can't have one of those things made for cats, because they would gorge themselves and eat the entire bag if they could- then refer back to the walking issue). Oh- let's add in a chef too- because even a sandwich is a pain to make- and I do love to cook- but not for myself. Can't forget the chauffeur, someone who can sit in that hateful line at the school to pick up Kaely, and can make runs to the store for a Slurpee, or a pack of gum- stupid stuff that used to be simple. Oh- and most importantly a Stylist, because the idea of blow-drying/straightening my hair and putting on makeup is a monumental task I usually only do on Fridays before Dave comes home- LOL. I sit there and think how nice it would be to sit in a chair and sip on a nice beverage while someone does it for me. :)

Let me acknowledge we've had lots of family & friends offer their help- even to do half the stuff I'm whining about- so thank you. But in reality, no, I have to suck it up and do it myself, because otherwise what's left? Me sitting here staring at Chase all day- which I'd gladly do- but is not realistic. Plus, it is a big challenge everytime the schedule is interrupted when we have guests or have to go somewhere, and it takes hours or a full day to get him back to a normal/health eating & sleeping schedule- which is no good and stresses me out all the more. BLAH.

So I'll just sit here and daydream about all the items floating over to my spot on the couch, or me crossing my arms and nodding my head (I Dream of Jeanie) and am magically transported to another location (i.e., Miami???) without the stress of packing up the car... I'm just whining to whine- in reality things are quite wonderful once you look past the haze of exhaustion and elementary school induced colds (grrrrr). Hope everyone is having a great one as well!

I'm Creating a Monster!

Happy 39 weeks gestational age! (LOL)... He still has 1 more week until he was actually due- so it's still bizarre that we've had so much time together already. This is where things get sticky...

Because he was a preemie, and we had so many challenges being in the NICU, the primary focus was providing him an environment as close to the womb as possible. Keeping him kangaroo'd and nuzzling as often as we could, minimal stimulation, and just sitting there staring at him for hours. Now, as he's starting to get to the "age" of a newborn, I'm wondering at what point we should start to introduce more "normal" activities, and worry about spoiling him. Hahaha... okay, in reality I'm a believer of not being able to spoil a baby- that by cuddling them and comforting them (almost) all the time, that you give them the security & safety that builds a confident and independent baby/child later on. At least that's what I've seen- exhibit A? Kaely. She was "spoiled" rotten as a baby, and is one of the most independent children I know. She knows she can explore or take chances and I'll be here if she needs me.

In the meantime... I have noticed how ridiculous it is with Chase... he knows the differences between his bed and us, and I can do just about anything I want, write on the blog, walk the dogs, put away dishes- as long as he's near me, he's happy as anything and will sleep peacefully. But put him in his bed and it'll be short-lived. Way to help that is use of white noise, and swaddling, but it still reduces his time in half. I have found the bouncy seat or swing to be useful for the sake of showering though- the noise of the shower or blow dryer keeps him snoozing!

So- at what point do you have the "tough love" approach and believe that they should be able to be on their own for stretches of time and all that? I'm still kind of in the mindset that he should still have possibly been in me- but then again- chances are he'd have been born by now too. I know I'm creating a monster- but sadly half of the comfort is for me too... lol. Oh well- for now I'll enjoy every moment- and hope the answers will become clear!

Here is him as I'm typing this post (haha):

How he spends part of the morning- just checking things out :) Wish I had a camera that does him justice though... he's too funny!

 Here's to enjoying another beautiful day! Oh- and Happy 1st SuperBowl Sunday!

Postpartum Myths...

I had to laugh listening to my sister complaining about being pregnant the other day, and all the things she can't wait to no longer deal with as soon as the baby is born... so I figured for the sake of realistic expectations (and laughs) I'd dispel those myths...

Things she looks forward to being rid of:

1. Swelling & Bloating - hahaha... okay, perhaps I don't have as much as I did before, but with raging & adjusting hormones trying to overtake my body once again, your intestines and everything else are still out of wack- and as you (my sister) heard me complaining the other day, the pain of gas & bloating still exist almost like the first trimester of pregnancy. UGH
2. Eat what I want! - see previous post about all the restrictions they recommend on when you nurse- seriously, I think it's almost worse than when I was pregnant, because at least when he was in utero, I never noticed if he was screaming & gassy from broccoli or too much dairy... granted, I do thoroughly enjoy having lunchmeat & sushi again.
3. Exercise & get back in shape - I couldn't wait! Now at 5+weeks postpartum, I'm still waiting on my doctor's appointment to get the go-ahead to even be able to walk briskly or lift over 10 lbs again. It's almost like being on bed rest still. I feel like such a bum!
4. Sleep- she seriously said this- hahahaha... okay, this was before she stayed over and may realize how it is to wake up every 2-3 hours, then have to stay up at least 15-30 minutes each time to nurse/change diapers/etc. Yes, the idea of not having to pee every hour is wonderful, but at least you can sleepwalk to the bathroom and be back to sleep in a matter of minutes. 
5. Not be such a *&$#!- okay, we know most pregnant ladies are a little nuts- and we deserved to be- but I think I've shown more temper and attitude postpartum than I ever did pregnant- and largely because it's about being overprotective (and over-exhausted) of baby boy... 
6. Get rid of maternity clothes! - I was so ready for this, especially living in Florida, most of the clothes I bought early in pregnancy were geared for "winter" and I never ended up wearing most. I did pack up a ton to try to sell to the consignment/2nd hand shop- which they kindly declined as being "out of season" but to keep and try again at the end of the year- UGH. But more-so, I still am wearing maternity jeans when I'm not wearing pajamas and yoga pants, and thanks to the enormous milk-makers, most of my pre-preggo shirts are too short. Not cool... sooooo- a lot of that maternity stuff is still lingering... 
7. Sleeping on my stomach again! -Once again, another myth, because unless you aren't nursing, there's no way you can sleep on your stomach without leaking & pain... not to mention those lovely nights of engorgement that make even sleeping on your side painful... seriously??? 
8. Lastly- the departure of "preggo brain"- I think it's even worse now, because at least before I could sleep to some degree, but adding in exhaustion to the distractions of juggling a newborn with other responsibilities around the home, then the still overwhelming hormones and all that craziness- yeah... I still forget what I walked into the other room for, completely forgot that I hadn't eaten breakfast yet yesterday, for more than 2 hours, forgot that people were coming over, have forgotten for almost a month to call/mail in the jury duty excuse request, etc, etc, etc... sigh... 

No matter what, all these things are worth the little bundle of joy of course- and I know these things will eventually pass/fade- but had to laugh as we sat there for a full day comparing the 38+weeks pregnancy with the 5 weeks postpartum, and how there isn't a whole lot of difference yet... 

Chase has been continuing to hang out more and more being alert & awake, so we've started playing around with the bouncy seat, swing, and trying to do more "tummy time" exercising. Developmentally he's still stuck between the preemie time-tables and regular newborn ones, but he's continuing to grow and thrive like a champ! 

Here is dad & him snoozing- I am sooooo jealous! 

A Picture Worth a Thousand Words...

Or several... the talent "Aunt" Jen has behind the camera is never shown off enough, and we are soooo fortunate to have time to play! Here are a few photos from Chase's photo shoot yesterday- these will be cherished forever!

More to come later!

(these are from 2/5/12 with Dad...)

Oh- and Happy 5 Weeks Baby Boy!!!

The Boobie Blues

Mastitis? Thrush? Gas? Oh My!

When sitting in the NICU cheering and fighting for every mL Chase was taking in, I never thought I'd be having to worry about more afterwards. UGH!

However, now that I have time to sit around and pay attention to things like sharp, stabbing pains in between feedings, I realized that I may need to look into things a bit more. Kaely completely spoiled me- I was in the place of blissful ignorance with her- I just kinda of "winged" it, and things worked. However Chase thinks it's fun to keep me on my toes ;)

I started noticing last week that I had brief, but recurring, quick stabbing/electrical feeling pains in my chest/breasts in-between feedings (in addition to the soreness/pain associated with any pressure like a hug, or trying to lay on my side or stomach), and out of curiosity I "googled" it (I should know by now not the best idea)... so what came up was "thrush" - and the only thing I could think of was I think I was given antibiotics immediately after the c-section, and maybe that triggered it? But looking at Chase, he didn't really have any symptoms either- except I did notice "Epstein pearls" - which is something else I had to google.. go figure. Then he had a really fussy night the other night, kind of gassy I guess, so I started to worry maybe it was something like thrush, and we needed to be treated.

If that wasn't a pain, I couldn't figure out which doctor to call- the pediatrician? the OB? my primary care physician? I ended up calling the OB, and got in with a nurse practioner yesterday afternoon. After having a screaming (hungry) baby boy scaring all the pregnant ladies (muwahahaha- preview), I sat in the exam room nursing him, and had to don the paper gown. Shockingly (sarcasm), the pain/discomfort is being chalked up to the "fullness" from stopping the pumping routine (thank goodness for now), and my over-abundant milk supply. Apparently people aren't supposed to have rock hard boobs all the time nursing- hmmm- really? I didn't realize they aren't supposed to constantly be full- or leaking at the slightest provocation- (sorry again for the TMI)... so of course thrush was (fortunately) taken off the list of issues, but discussions about making sure to prevent mastitis came up, since being so full can lead to blocked/clogged ducts and eventually infection if left. UGH!

Then, his fussiness? Well, of course that can be attributed to being a preemie, something I ate, etc- so (haha) then I google things to avoid when nursing- and this is the list that one website suggests (almost my entire diet):

1. Coffee
2. Chocolate
3. Citrus Fruits
4. Broccoli (and other gassy veggies)
5. Alcohol (more than 1 drink a day- duh)
6. Spicy foods
7. Garlic
8. Peanuts
9. Wheat
10. Dairy Products
11. Corn
12. Shellfish
13. Eggs
14. Soy
15. Fish
16. Peppermint
17. Parsley

Seriously???? Okay, so a lot is due to potential food allergies- so they recommend keeping a food diary- the peppermint & parsley is due to decreasing the milk supply- but I think I've had almost that entire list in the past week alone. So depressing to consider eliminating almost everything (obviously in extreme cases), but also knowing I'm hurting him (his stomach) by things that I'm eating by trying to help him (the infamous list of what I need to eat in order to produce enough)- talk about a fine line!!! 

Oh well... so at the end of the day I guess we're both fine, I just have to hang in there while my body adjusts to his feeding demands (which is less than the pumping), and try to get his night/day schedules flip-flopped... He had a quiet night last night, as I tried to be careful about what I ate yesterday, I guess it is situational- which is better than something more serious. Never a moment without some worry- I swear! 

His updates? Another quiet day I hope- planning on an in-home photo session today- so that should be fun, and I can't wait to post the amazing photos I know will come :)

I <3 our Jen :)

The Hearts That Make a Home

Yes, I'm grateful to be home versus at the hospital, but every day I realize it's sooooo much more than that. 

First, what makes me stubbornly keep my feet planted here in our house against other options, is because I can't move our neighbors with us! I cannot believe we're coming up on 4 years here, and 4 years since we were delivered homemade scones while Dave & I were outside busting our butts in the yard. Since then, whether we liked it or not (which of course we loved it), we were adopted and have been looked after- family that chose us. The other night there was a scare (I won't mention details), but point is- made me realize how important it is for us all to have neighbors and people to look out for each other. 

Speaking of... this was just delivered to us- I mean, what child doesn't want to grow up in Mickey Mouse World??? We are sooooo spoiled- between everyone who works for "The Mouse" and allows us to visit every year, but the nightly fireworks we watch from our backyard that are set off at The Magic Kingdom. I mean, we sit in Kaely's room and see the whole show. Years later we rarely even notice the booms- how sad to take something that magical for granted??

The yard... the poor, poor yard... how much I loved to work in the yard... between the mini-paradise koi pond we had hand-dug (hahaha) until the stupid cranes & heron came and ate all my fish and I finally lost it and filled it in... to the crazy hibiscus bushes that are now taller than me... I look at the fact that the past year of bed rest and craziness has kept me from playing in the yard, and how we'll have to re-sod or seed the whole stinkin' yard now... but man I miss playing in the dirt, planting seeds and having a living display of art & creativity. The same reason an apartment/condo sounds wonderful is the same thing I'd miss... (if anyone knows of any adopt-a-yard charities, let me know! LOL- I could use help getting green grass again)

Every splash of paint, each stain, hole in the wall, etc. in this house tells a story... yes, it's just a house- I know this, and more house than we really need... but... so much blood, sweat and tears has gone into it, it's more than that. This is the longest I've ever lived in one place- and wanted to- aside from as a kid at my mom's. I am a nomad at heart, and have always wanted to keep on the move... but now? Something about the school Kaely goes to, the neighbors, the memories... well... it's hard to let go. 

At least I know that the dreams that brought Chase here to us, will follow us no matter where we go, and this will always be his first home- as much as it is ours... but photos like these are priceless :)

(Kaely over 3 years ago...)